Dear Lord that game was ugly. We all had to watch it and I’m sure we’d all prefer not to relive it. So, this week’s Roundup will be light on the game heavy on the random non-sense. Perfect, right?

The Game

Injury News

There’s no denying it. The Hokies have been severely hampered with injuries this season. They were down to their 4th-string RB for that ugly game in Heinz among countless other depth issues. The most notable of which is the torn meniscus of starting DT Luther Maddy. Big Lu famously played the entire Georgia Tech game on that injured knee and was looking to come back this season following surgery. However, Luther announced on Twitter today that he will be undergoing his second surgery of the season and seeking a Redshirt so that he can return for the 2015 season.

I really feel for Big Lu and here’s to hoping that his surgery is successful and he can come back as strong as ever next year, ready to impress the scouts and anchor another dominate Virginia Tech defense.

Good luck Lu!

T-Minus 24 Hours

At the time of me writing this we are exactly 24 hours away  from the Hokies taking the field against “The U” I don’t think I need to write a single letter about this game. We all know exactly what this game means.

We remember this:



giffffr (1)

Of course, this:

giffffr (2)


Do you notice something in that first clip? Does anything specifically stick out to you? Maybe something about, I dunno, uniforms? THAT’S RIGHT. THAT’s F***IN’ RIGHT. #ALLMAROONEVERYTHING. The VT FB Equipment Twitter account has officially teased/hinted at the #ALLMAROONEVERYTHING possibility.

Making it official. If we are not rockin’ maroon on maroon on maroon on maroon on maroon then there will be a riot. So for all of those lucky enough to be able to go to the game tomorrow. GET LOUD. We need this win tomorrow.

This Week In Florida

SpeekzThis Week In Florida takes on a bit of extra meaning as we celebrate our disdain for those from the state of Florida during the game tomorrow while laughing at their disgusting debauchery.

This week we got the goodness. That realllll nice Florida Man action.

A man who goes by the name Justchilis-cookin J Speekz uploaded some sensual, Chili’s hotness to “The Facebook.” Yes, Mr. Speekz decided that whilst working at Chili’s that he just had to pop off his shirt and take some shirtless pics rockin’ his Chili’s apron in the Chili’s kitchen and upload them to the ol’ Facebook. He has since been fired. Which is, in my opinion, horse shit. Mr. Justin J is only trying to bring a little more Florida hawtness to this world. Mr. Speekz is bringin’ more spice and excitement than Chili’s Southwest Egg Rollz. We here at the Drunken Gobbler took an exclusive peek into his facebook account to find this FIRE. So we must take a stand, now. When a poor victim such as Justin Speekz tries to make an honest living cooking up tasty appetizers at reasonable prices and serving up hotness with a side of sex appeal for free. This man should be applauded, not fired. SCapture


 That’s All Folks

I successfully wrote more about a fired Chili’s cook from Florida than both our game last week and this week’s game combined and I’m completely okay with that. No more words should be written or spoken about that Pitt game and no words are needed about this Miami game. So if you’re making the trip. Tailgate hard, Yell harder, and let’s beat Miami.

Thanks again y’all!

I won’t keep y’all long today, week 7 was indeed Bye Week for the Hokies and the great news is, we managed not to lose at home this week. In fact, our Coastal chances improved in the off week due to a Duke win over Georgia Tech. How lovely. So let’s get this thing goin’



Image Courtesy of 247Sports

Each of the past two weeks we’ve discussed devastating injuries to key players on both sides of the ball. Big Lu played the Georgia Tech game with a torn meniscus, Shai McKenzie was lost for the season to a torn ACL, and Marshawn Williams suffered an ankle sprain against the Tar Heels. There were admittedly low expectations that Williams and Maddy could possibly return for the Pittsburgh game but they were both officially ruled out of the game.

Thank the Lord for the Week 7 Bye, which couldn’t have come at a better time, as the troops were starting to look quite depleted. The Week 7 Bye represented a lot of different things. It was finally a week without terrible injury news, it was a week for the players to get right (both mentally and physically) and it was essentially ‘halftime’ for the season – a time for the Hokies to regroup and get ready for the second half of the season. Michael Brewer even said in the Monday presser, “It was nice to finally get 100% healthy. Feel good now, feel 100%.” which I thought was particularly telling and his <100% status could easily be seen each time he scraped himself off the turf. 

But now? Now it’s Pitt Week.



In the Week 6 Roundup we had some BIG Basketball ‘Crootin news when the Hokies locked up Kerry Blackshear. This week Buzz “The Swagnosticator” Williams* is back at it again with the commitment of 2015 PG Justin Robinson. 

*-nickname pending approval









AND a professional Hokie took notice of the committment:

Robinson is a big-time get for the Hokies and the future of the program that Buzz seems to be building a solid foundation for. Justin is listed at 6’1″, 170 lbs  and plays his High School ball for St. James School outside of D.C. and AAU ball for Boo Williams. Justin looks to be a great addition to the future backcourt that looks to be coming together well for the future.

Check out this video from his commitment, from DMVElite

Sure, he said Virginia Tech University but tons of people make that mistake AND he’s rockin’ the Virginia Tech Bucket Hat. A must have for all new VT commits.


What? Basketball ‘crootin before Football ‘crootin?!?!? Calm yourself. Basketball barely get’s any of the spotlight so let’s give Buzz and his boys the attention they deserve. But… now it’s time to catch up on the latest ‘crootin news for Fancy Gap Frank.

Coleman Foxson of former Hokie, Rich Fox, became the latest to add to the Virginia Tech family tradition with his commitment last Friday. Fox is a local product, playing high school ball just down 81 for Salem. He is listed as a 5′-11″ 190 lb 3-star RB and so far, the Hokies are the only major D-1 program to have offered. Where he best projects to for the Hokies is unclear as the RB position seems to be one of the deeper positions for the Hokies and starting reps will be hard to come by with the stable of young athletes we have at this position. Nevertheless, it is players like Fox that made this program great and will continue to do so. Welcome aboard, Coleman.

Josh SweatYou should know by now that the Number 1 recruit in the nation suffered a nasty knee injury in his high school game back in September. He has since had surgery and is now on the recovery process. Just recently, he rescheduled all of his official visits for the Fall. His first visit will be to Georgia on November 15, then Florida State on November 22nd, and his final visit will be to Blacksburg for the UVa game on November 27th and 28th. Getting the last visit seems to be good for the Hokies and he has already seen the Hokies play this year when they took on a little team called Ohio State, and oh yeah, they won that game. 

Sweat is not the only top DL the Hokies are in the running for in the 2015 class. There is also Jalen Dalton, long thought to be a UNC lock has been trending towards the Hokies over the past few weeks. The 6’4″ 235lb 5-Star WDE has since named both the Hokies and Tar Heels as his top 2 and if things aren’t completely swinging to the Hokies they’re at least making it close. Just one month ago the Hokies were all but out of it so the ground that the coaching staff has made up in such a short time is nothing but impressive. It doesn’t hurt that the Hokies defense marched into Chapel Hill and held the high-powered Tar Heels offense to 17 points. Oh yeah, did I mention that was DURING Dalton’s official visit to UNC. Because it was. 

The Hokies have to finish on Sweat and Dalton, but if they do this DL recruiting class would be the best in the country and that is not hyperbole.

It’s Pitt week y’all…

Not only is it Pitt week, but it’s Pitt-At-Heinz-on-Thursday week and that means a number of things. One: every Hokie fan should be scared to death of this game. Why? The Hokies have never won on Heinz field. Ever. That dates back to the Big East days of Kevin Jones against Larry Fitzgerald.  Yeah, it’s bad, and the most recent chapter in this book was the 2012 game which was one of the worst games I’ve seen Virginia Tech play in a number of years.  This will, however, be the first game that the Hokies will play the Panthers with both teams being members of the ACC and maybe, just maybe, that is the secret to breaking the Heinz curse. All I know is I’m going to force myself to use Hunt’s Ketchup until we beat them and I’d really prefer not to.FitzVT

So, whatever you fans have  been doing every time the Hokies have played at Heinz, don’t do that. Do the opposite. If you’ve taken your girlfriend out on a lovely date each time, do the opposite. Tell her you hate her ignore her. If you were a good father to your children each time. Do the opposite. Tell them that you hate them and ignore them. I’m just sayin’ we need this win at all costs and if we lose, I blame all of you.

This Week in Florida

This. Week. In. FLORIDAAAAA.

Once again, you readers are in for a treat, a tasty, Florida treat.  Last week we had Jags lady, spotted watching the Jags game from the lovely stadium pool in jeans and a shirt cause why not? Gotta protect yourself from that there ‘E-Boli.’

This week, we got ourselves a Florida HEIST. Ocean’s 11 style. Investigations are under way in St. Petersburg, Florida after a truck was stolen on Monday. It’s contents? Try 36,000 lbs of Crisco. Yes, Crisco. Yes, 18 tons of it. Somewhere in Florida is a man rich with Crisco. Like the Scrooge McDuck of Shortening, he is likely swimming in a pool of it at this moment. The investigation is currently in Day 4 and there is no sign of the missing shortening. Shortening experts estimate the value of the Crisco to be just shy of $100,000.  If you want to learn more about this dastardly act the Tampa Bay Times has you covered right Here.

Thank you, Florida.

Photo Courtesy of 247Sports

Photo Courtesy of 247Sports

Trey Edmunds Injury

I really hate that this is starting to become a weekly thing, but it is the nature of the sport. Trey Edmunds was lost in the second half after pulling up mid-run and limping out of bounds with an apparent upper body injury. X-rays later confirmed that Edmunds had suffered a broken clavicle. This was Edmunds first game back as a primary ball carrier for the Hokies after coming back from a broken leg last season. The Hokies’ injury concerns didn’t end with Edmunds with Freshman sensation Marshawn Williams leaving the game earlier in the second half with a lower leg injury. Fortunately, Williams X-rays came back negative and it appears to be a sprained ankle for the big guy. Nevertheless, the Hokies have been bitten BADLY by the injury bug, but hopefully their luck will turn around soon and this week’s bye could not have come at a better time for a beaten up Hokies squad.


This past Friday, Hokies target Houshun Gaines, a DE out of North Carolina’s Nash Central, was set to make his decision between the Hokies, Florida Gators, and NC State Wolfpack. However, he showed up to his commitment with a VT hat, Florida hat and Miami hat. “Hey, that’s not THAT weird,” sure, NC State was believed to be one of the favorites to get the talented DE but apparently wasn’t, not THAT weird. Houshun picked the Gators much to the dismay of Hokie fans. However, this seemed to come as a surprise to Gators fans and coaches who had seemed to cool off on Gaines as of late and still have bigger fish to fry when it comes to the DE position. Speaking of fish,  you may ask, “If Florida wasn’t going to honor his commitment then why did he choose them?” Well, it seems he may have been catfished. Yep, like the MTV show. According to a story by the Rocky Mount Telegram, it appears that Gaines was catfished by a Twitter user posing as a member of the Florida Coaching staff, and had been for a good while.

Gaines has since opened his recruitment back up and seems to be handling this entire fiasco pretty well. The Hokies remain firmly in the picture for Gaines and for Gaines at least it’s pretty unlikely to get catfished twice? Right? 

Moving on…

The Game: Virginia Tech 34 – UNC 17

The Hokies came out fast once again this week forcing a Marquise Willia- BREAKING NEWS: I HAVE AN URGENT NEWS BULLETIN.



Buzz has delivered again. That’s right folks, Buzz “The Disciple of Funk” Williams* has secured his first commit of the 2015 class and it is a big one. Literally, he is a very large human being. Kerry Blackshear, 6’8″ Power Forward out of Maynard Evans High School in Orlando, FL committed to the Hokies on Saturday and adds to the already promising list of recruits that would not have come to Tech if it weren’t for Buzz. Blackshear is a 4-star recruit rated as a 94 by 247Sports and is rated the #75 player in their Top247 Rankings.

*nickname still pending approval

FINE. FINE. The Game: Virginia Tech 34 – UNC 17

The Good

Defense: I don’t usually worry much about Bud Foster’s crew but the Tar Heels do usually field a good offensive unit and this year is no different. Going into this game they averaged over 41 points per game but the Hokies were not about to allow that. The success on defense started on the very first play as Ekanem and Dadi got home on Marquise Williams and forced a fumble deep in UNC territory. The Hokies have had trouble in the past containing mobile QBs and Marquise had a fair amount of success with his feet against the Hokies. In the end, though, the Tech defense put in an overall solid performance holding the high flying UNC offense to a meager 17 points. Two players in particular had exceptional games: Kendall Fuller and Ken Ekanem. Kendall became the 4th Fuller brother to score a Touchdown for Virginia Tech with his Pick 6 right before halftime. Ken Ekanem put up one of the best individual defensive efforts under Bud Foster, which is saying quite a bit. Ekanem scored a 71 in Bud Foster’s defensive grading system with 6 tackles, 3 sacks including that forced fumble on the first play. Both of these performances were good enough to earn the two Hokies All-ACC honors; Kendall was recognized as the ACC DB of the Week and Ekanem the ACC DL of the Week.

Young Receivers: Okay, I could talk about the defense all day but I could also talk about these damn receivers all day too. Isaiah Ford, Cam Phillips and Bucky Hodges all had great games again. Bucky had the lone TD reception for the trio when he found the end zone early in the first half off of a play action on a Deon Newsome sweep (I might add I’ve been yelling for this play call for weeks). Ford and Phillips tried to one up each other with ridiculous catches on the sideline. If you somehow missed Ford’s catch, just… just watch.. RIDICULOUS.


Virginia Tech fans: Yeah that’s right give yourself a damn round of applause. First of all, we made Kenan Stadium, Lane Stadium South. We own that joint. In seeing multiple pictures of the crowd, by the second half it was maroon and orange, with a little bit of Carolina Blue and a lot of empty seats. The road excellence continues for the Hokie faithful.

Secondly, us Hokies did GOOD. Yes, we did good. The fine people over at and friends of the site made a wager that they would donate to St. Judes if Brewer didn’t throw a pick. It gained some traction on Twitter and more Hokies (Including yours truly) decided to add to this wager. Long story short, Brewer throws a pick but in the good cheer of the victory we all decided we’d go ahead and donate anyway and, well, we’ve donated OVER $2500!!! If you would like to donate to St. Jude’s in the name of Virginia Tech Hokie fans click on the link provided. Help out a good cause!

St. Jude’s Donation Link CLICK ME :)

The Bad

Penalties: I really don’t think I need to say anything about this. Too many false starts and holding penalties. Unacceptable.

The Ugly

UNC: (Everything) HA. Suck it, UNC. I probably wouldn’t have listed them here if it weren’t for Larry Fedora who decided he didn’t want to show our Defense any respect when he said “I’d love to tell you that Virginia Tech is a great defense and did something spectacular, but it was whatever we could do wrong, whatever could go wrong for us offensively, went wrong the entire first half.” 

Yeah, ok Coach Fedora. Whatever you say. 


This Week in Florida.

Sure, the Houshun Gaines story could qualify as your weekly does of Florida. Hell, we even got a Florida commitment in basketball but that’s just no fun. The Gaines story ya just feel bad for the kid and the commitment is just great news for the Hokies. That’s not the point of TWIF.

This Week in Florida is meant for gems such as this. The lovely Jacksonville Jaguars fan who enjoyed the Jags loss just hangin out in jeans in the pool. 


As this is the first weekly “This Week in Florida” I feel I owe my readers a bit of an explanation. We here at The Drunken Gobbler are a Virginia Tech blog, I am an Arlington, VA resident and have never lived in Florida. But. I have developed an interest in the curiosities that are the state of Florida and it’s inhabitants. So, I feel I am doing my readers a great service in bringing to you one weekly Florida tidbit. Enjoy.

Week 5 was an interesting one for the Hokies. There were definite highs and absolute lows but at the end of the day, the Hokies got back in the Win column.

Shai McKenzie

Quick to become a fan favorite, true freshman Shai McKenzie showed power and explosiveness in his first games back from a torn ACL in his senior season at Washington High School. Shai had just eclipsed 1 year since his injury when he went down in the second half against Western Michigan with an apparent knee injury. This definitely hurts the Running Back corps but more importantly, Shai. After fighting back from a torn ACL suffered last September, he looked to be running smoothly and the knee did not seem to slow him down. With this most recent setback, I would have to imagine that Shai takes advantage of his redshirt he didn’t use this year to take all of next season to rehab and recover from this injury so that he can come back the following season as healthy as possible. We, along with all Hokies, hope Shai has a speedy, but most importantly, a FULL recovery from this injury.

The Game

The Hokies came out hot scoring the fastest touchdown in Frank Bea-OH HOL’ UP HOL’ UP WHO FLIPPED TO THE HOKIES WUT?

Darius Fullwood Flips

Photo Courtesy of 247Sports

Photo Courtesy of 247Sports

HUGE news. Darius “Dee” Fullwood, ranked a 247Sports 3-star 89, and the #9 player in the state of Maryland flipped his commitment from Kentucky to Virginia Tech last Wednesday. Fullwood is listed as a 6’4″ 240 lb WDE by 247Sports and hails from Our Lady of Good Counsel High School in Olney, MD. Darius represents a continued success in Maryland for the Hokies along with names like Kendall Fuller (a fellow Good Counsel grad), Melvin Keihn, and Cam Phillips joining the Hokies in recent years.

Fullwood is the first flip TO the Hokies in the 2015 cycle, and it sure is nice to be on the receiving end of a flipped commitment. As you may, or may not, recall; the Hokies have lost 2 commitments this cycle. One, Michael Barnett, who decommitted before committing to FSU, whom he eventually decommitted from to then commit to UGA. The other, Marcus Lewis. Lewis decommitted before committing to Florida, whom HE eventually decommitted from as well. YAY DECISIONS.

Oh yeah, the game.

Hey y’all, we played that football thing this weekend. That was neat, huh?


That’s right y’all, as I was writing this the Hokies secured a commitment from recently offered Fredrick Johnson. This is a HUGE pickup for the Hokies, with the Hokies snagging the 6’6.5″ 301 lb OT out of Florida. The Hokies were his 2nd official offer and locked him up just days after his official visit this past weekend. Johnson helps to fill a big position of need as the OLine has been a priority for the 2014 and now, the 2015 class for the Hokies. Fredrick joins fellow  OT Mike Arnold, also from the state of Florida, as the 2nd Offensive Tackle in the 2015 class. 

We here at the Drunken Gobbler are huge fans, HUGE FANS, of Big Uglies (especially when they come in as Offensive Linemen and not Tight Ends).  Now, I just feel like there’s something I’ve been forgetting.

Ah, of course, the game.

 Like I said, we played this sport called football this past weekend and by ‘we’ I mean the ‘Virginia Tech Hokies Football Team.’ Did we play this football game well? That’s a tough question to answer: “well” is a relative term as well. We certainly played the sport, I can say that with almost certainty. In fact, mathematically speaking, one might be able to determine that we achieved victory in this match. 

Really, really terrible joking aside, the game went okay. We got a ‘W’ but losing McKenzie for at least this season really put a damper on any positives from this game.

Quarterback Play

I would’ve really liked to have seen Brewer take a big step forward against a relatively weak opponent. He made some good throws, he made some good decisions, but he also made some mistakes. Overall, he played okay. He threw touchdown passes to a wide open Bucky Hodges and a 7 yard fade to Isaiah Ford which accounted for 2 of his 14 total completions. He threw 2 INTs, the first of which was, simply put, BAADDDDDD. It appeared he didn’t see the underneath guy when targeting Knowles and he made Brewer pay, almost returning the pick for a solid sick. His second interception was a shot to the end zone in which he slightly overthrew Isaiah Ford who, in Brewer’s defense, didn’t put up much of a fight for a ball that he could have, at the very least, knocked away if not caught. Brewer continued his trend of a few beautiful passes, a large percentage of decent decisions (i.e. throwing the ball away, stepping up and running, etc.), but then just a couple bad, bad throws. 

He gets a C.

Running Backs

The rushing attack of the Hokies was a force to be reckoned with…. in the second half, that is. The Hokies finished the game with a monstrous 308 yards rushing with Marshawn Williams breaking the 100 yard mark, going for 119 yards and Shai with a solid 87 yards and a TD on the ground before his devastating injury. However, the Hokies rushing game didn’t really take off until the second half when it seemed that Fancy Gap Frank and the Blacksburg Boys decided to make running the ball down WMU’s throat an absolute priority. 

I will give these boys an A-, attributing a decent amount of the first half struggle to the O-line. 


The defense played well. Did they play out of their minds? No. Did they go out there and do their job? Yes. They played disciplined, Virginia Tech defense and limited to the Broncos to 17 points with 7 of those points coming on a 2 yard drive by the Broncos following Brewer’s first pick. Detrick Bonner got himself a nice sliding interception while Kyshoen and Kendall collided to each prevent the other from getting a pick. 

Good, solid performance: B+

Special Teams


Alrighty then, the boys on Special Teams made their presence known very quickly when Ronny Vandyke jarred the ball loose on the opening touchdown to create the fastest Touchdown in Frank Beamer’s tenure with a lightning fast 0:08 score by Andrew Motuapuaka

Then Joey Slye missed the extra point.

But then Western Michigan snapped the ball over their punter’s head for a safety on the following drive.

Then Slye made a field goal!

But then he missed a field goal.

But hey then he made another field goal!

Yay Special Teams.

Extra points be damned, I’m happy any time we score a Special Teams Touchdown like we did, so I’ll give Slye a D, but the rest of the Special Teams gets an A+.

That’s all folks!

It was quite a week in Virginia Tech Football, with the good and the very bad, but we got a win and now it’s UNC Hate Week. Celebrate Accordingly. I will be back, hopefully tonight, with a quick preview of the week ahead. 

As always, thanks for readin’